Reviewed by Gayle Williams
Margarita Nazarenko’s Unbothered is not a manifesto for indifference. Rather, it is a guide to developing personal standards and living by them with confidence, free from the weight of other people’s opinions. At its core, the book encourages readers to cultivate enough self‑trust that external approval no longer dictates their emotional landscape.
Although the book initially appears to focus on dating and relationships, Nazarenko extends her principles to the workplace and to friendship dynamics, where similar patterns of people‑pleasing, over-functioning, and emotional dependence often emerge. Her emphasis is consistent: prioritise self‑care, establish healthy boundaries, and detach from behaviours or relationships that erode your sense of autonomy.
Key themes explored include:
- letting go of people‑pleasing,
- choosing rather than chasing in life and relationships,
- recognising when you are “performing” for approval,
- understanding that your worth is not contingent on someone else’s validation,
- caring less about external judgement,
- reducing over‑functioning in relationships,
- learning to articulate your needs clearly.
The book’s structure is both deliberate and accessible. Each chapter opens with a guiding statement, followed by illustrative stories—some drawn from Nazarenko’s own experiences—alongside exercises, reflection prompts, and pocket mantras. Every chapter concludes with a section titled “How We Walk Out of This Chapter,” reinforcing the key takeaways in a practical, digestible way. This consistent format makes the content easy to follow and encourages active engagement.
The final chapter, “The Unbothered Woman in Practice,” adopts a question‑and‑answer format, addressing common concerns and clarifying concepts introduced throughout the book. With its numerous exercises and journaling prompts, Unbothered feels like a text that would pair naturally with a companion workbook or dedicated space for readers to record their reflections.
While not all of the advice directly applied to my own life, I found two of my personal practices unexpectedly validated: my sacred morning coffee hour—a quiet, grounding ritual before the day begins—and the simple liberation of switching my phone to Do Not Disturb, refusing to be ruled by the ping of notifications. It seems I am already, in part, “unbothered,” and other readers may discover the same.
Nazarenko, an Australian author, podcaster, and social media creator with a Diploma in Life Coaching, aims to help women build confidence in both life and relationships. Unbothered succeeds in offering readers a structured, compassionate framework for doing exactly that.
Unbothered
by Margarita Nazarenko
[2026]
Hatchette Australia
Paperback
ISBN: 978 0 7336 5472 5
$34.99; 308pp